Sandra Heska King

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40 Words of Lent 2014: Day 21 (Love Idol Giveaway)

March 25, 2014 By Sandra Heska King

love idol worn out

(Worn out working for approval? Get this book.)

Counting on approval?

But if we’re approved by everyone

and we’re never unapproved,

is that approval empty?

Should we worry?

Because if everyone approves,

maybe we’re not living in the light

of the one whose approval is

all that counts.

Word Count: 40

NOTE: I have a copy of this book to give away. Just leave a comment below answering this question from the discussion guide at the back of the book: “The Love Idol can manifest itself in a variety of ways: perfectionism, approval seeking, people pleasing, comparing ourselves to others. Which do you most relate to?” The grandgirl will draw a name on Monday, March 31.

heron2

Today’s Reading: Acts 1-6

In the stillness,

Sandy

 #LentChallenge

LoveIdolCutOuts - preapproved2

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Filed Under: 40 Words of Lent - 2014, Blog, stories

Comments

  1. Patricia @ Pollywog Creek says

    March 25, 2014 at 9:22 am

    Amen, sister!

    • Sandra Heska King says

      March 25, 2014 at 11:15 am

      I’ve got to remember this. 😉

  2. Jen Stults says

    March 25, 2014 at 10:44 am

    I most relate to the love idol of perfectionism. I’m learning to be content with my work-in-progress status now. 🙂

    • Sandra Heska King says

      March 25, 2014 at 11:17 am

      I hear you, Jen. I think that’s what sometimes leads me to procrastination. I need to remember that being a work in progress is okay… that I’ll never arrive until I arrive. In the meantime, I need to remember that He already sees me as perfect. 🙂

  3. Jen Ferguson says

    March 25, 2014 at 12:02 pm

    Amen, girl. Amazing how much power can be packed in 40 words.

    • Sandra Heska King says

      March 25, 2014 at 10:31 pm

      😀 😀

  4. Kristin Waters says

    March 25, 2014 at 12:19 pm

    Ah, gotta love God’s timing!
    I am a recovering approval-seeker. Notice I said that in the present tense – I am still working on it!
    Thank you,
    Kristin

    • Sandra Heska King says

      March 25, 2014 at 10:21 pm

      Like Jen (above) says, I think we’re all works in progress. If only we could fully get the knowledge from our head to our hearts that God is crazy in love with us, that He cherishes us–just as we are. Right. Now.

      So glad to see you here, Kristin.

  5. Marie Bride says

    March 25, 2014 at 2:17 pm

    Love it Sandra’
    Pre-Approved sister

    • Sandra Heska King says

      March 25, 2014 at 10:13 pm

      😀

  6. Mark says

    March 25, 2014 at 3:44 pm

    I’m a dad. My daughter, who is absolutely beautiful struggles with perfectionism. It breaks my heart to see her compare herself to the phony model of beauty in our society today. I would love for her to see herself through my eyes…and the eyes of our Heavenly Father!

    • Sandra Heska King says

      March 25, 2014 at 10:18 pm

      Oh, I see this so often… and hear words like this: “I’m too fat, I’m too skinny, I’m ugly, everyone laughs at my clothes, I don’t like my hair, I could never be as smart as her…” Your daughter is so blessed to have you as her dad, Mark. Praying right now that she would see herself through your eyes and her Father’s eyes.

  7. Martha Orlando says

    March 25, 2014 at 6:40 pm

    It’s all about God’s approval, isn’t it?
    Sandy, just asking that you could keep my family and me in prayer. We lost my dad last week after a long battle with Alzheimer’s. The memorial service is tomorrow.
    Love and blessings, my friend.

    • Sandra Heska King says

      March 25, 2014 at 10:13 pm

      Oh, Martha. I’m so sorry. Yes, I am praying now. I will pray tomorrow. And next week… Much love to you, my friend.

  8. Lynn Mosher says

    March 25, 2014 at 9:55 pm

    Your words are always perfect! Unfortunately, on occasion, the unlovely creature of comparison rears its ugly head. Sometimes get blisters from stomping on his head! 🙁

    • Sandra Heska King says

      March 25, 2014 at 10:18 pm

      I’ve got a few of those blisters…

  9. Barbie says

    March 26, 2014 at 3:09 am

    I constantly compare myself to others. I long for the day when I stop looking at others, what they are doing, and thinking I have to do the same. Oh, I struggle with all of the others too, just this one is most prominant in this season.

    • Sandra Heska King says

      March 27, 2014 at 10:20 pm

      “In this season.” Since I’m much older than most of the “popular” bloggers and writers, I struggle with this, too. I wish I’d been as wise at their age. I learn so much from them.

  10. Teresa says

    March 26, 2014 at 12:42 pm

    I really want to read this book! I do too much comparing myself to others and people pleasing. I always want people to think “the best” of me, and that is an impossible standard. For some reason, I wasn’t so worried about what others thought when I was in my early 20s… and I was happier when that wasn’t a part of my thinking. It is reassuring to know that we are preapproved through God.

    • Sandra Heska King says

      March 28, 2014 at 10:21 am

      I can’t remember when I didn’t need to please–though I don’t think I thought about it that much. Now I’m more aware of it. Maybe that’s the difference.

      What do you think changed for you, Teresa?

  11. Rebecca says

    March 26, 2014 at 2:08 pm

    My love idol definitely manifests itself in approval seeking, although the others are there at times too. So excited to get my hands on a copy of this!

    • Sandra Heska King says

      March 28, 2014 at 10:23 am

      I think you’re right, Rebecca. If we’re honest, we all struggle with each of them in some way.

  12. Debra Southern says

    March 26, 2014 at 2:33 pm

    I could say all, but Approval Seeking is the worst. I am constantly second guessing, changing my mind, and asking everyone for their opinion, so I don’t hurt anyone’s feelings. It usually leads to high anxiety, and frozen in action, where nothing gets accomplished.

    • Sandra Heska King says

      March 28, 2014 at 10:24 am

      Second-guessing… not wanting to hurt feelings. Just reading this makes me anxious. I get this. I want everyone to just. be. happy. I like peace… hate conflict.

  13. Alicia F says

    March 26, 2014 at 3:35 pm

    I relate most to perfectionism and approval seeking. (If I’m perfect people will approve of me.) I love the thought of Pre-Approved.

    • Sandra Heska King says

      March 28, 2014 at 10:25 am

      And you are, Alicia! Preapproved with nothing to prove.

  14. Jami says

    March 26, 2014 at 4:17 pm

    I guess perfectionism. Although I am “do it perfect or don’t bother”. Sometimes I have to learn that my good enough is good enough.

    • Sandra Heska King says

      March 28, 2014 at 10:26 am

      “My good enough is good enough.” Amen.

  15. Jennifer says

    March 26, 2014 at 5:38 pm

    I struggle with all of those things, especially during this time in my life…our family is dealing with brokenness, and I am longing for healing and restoration, yet I often feel like I don’t matter and I am not good enough…I know that God sees it differently and I trust in His promises, but I still struggle with feeling like a failure, unworthy, unlovable…the list goes on…

    • Sandra Heska King says

      March 28, 2014 at 10:29 am

      Oh, Jennifer. I wish I could reach through this screen and wrap my arms around you and whisper how much you are loved. I’m praying right now that you can melt into God and know, know, know how much He treasures you just as you are. You matter more than a single feather on a wee sparrow’s head. xoxo

  16. Krista says

    March 26, 2014 at 6:34 pm

    The approval seeking and perfectionism. Being new to the area and still working to make friends, I too easily slip on a facade into either approval seeking or perfectionism instead of being who God made me.

    • Sandra Heska King says

      March 28, 2014 at 10:42 am

      If we could only remember that there are people who also seek our approval…

      Praying you’ll find a new circle of soul sisters in this new place, Krista.

  17. tricia says

    March 26, 2014 at 7:07 pm

    Is there a way to say all of the above?! Ugh… If I had to pick just one, and that’s such a struggle, I guess I would say maybe approval seeking. I’ve never, ever felt good enough…and I think that motivating force drives every thing I do in life. I KNOW in my head what I’ve read that God says about His love for me, but I have such a hard time accepting it because I’m so broken and still such a failure… How could I STILL be good enough for Him…the One I want to please & whose approval I crave most?

    • Sandra Heska King says

      March 28, 2014 at 10:45 am

      Oh, Tricia. Why is it so hard sometimes to get the truth from our heads to our hearts? I think I know where this not-good-enough feeling came from for me, and it’s a trick my brain played from one small incident. I’ll be writing about it in my own memoir–if I ever finish it. 😉

  18. Sheri says

    March 26, 2014 at 8:06 pm

    It is hard to pick just one because I find myself having trouble with most of these. I guess I would pick people pleasing as the top one. This book is definitely on my TBR list. I would love to win a copy!!

    Thanks!
    Sheri

    • Sandra Heska King says

      March 28, 2014 at 10:54 am

      I hope you do win, Sheri. I’m aware of at least three other giveaways you can enter.

      Charity: http://charitysingletoncraig.com/2014/03/25/my-word-of-the-week-preapproved/

      Laura: http://www.lauraboggess.com/2014/03/its-love-idol-giveaway.html

      Kris: http://kriscamealy.com/whats-your-love-idol/

  19. Marie Bride says

    March 27, 2014 at 4:54 pm

    The amazing an absolute gift of crushing the Love Idol and accepting
    Pre-Approved status is Fabulous!!!
    Thank You for your post Sandra!

    • Sandra Heska King says

      March 28, 2014 at 10:55 am

      Thanks for coming by, Marie. I love the sound of the shattering of idols. 🙂

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