Sandra Heska King

daring to open doors

Clinging to the Muchness of This

By

 

Isaiah 43:1

“I’m adopted!” I spit those words at my parents and slammed the door. It was about the worse thing I could think of to say.

I didn’t know what adopted meant, but I was pretty sure it meant I didn’t belong.

That they didn’t really love me.

How could they? How much could they love a naughty child?

It hangs over my writing desk, this verse. The original frame fell apart. I’ve had it for nearly 30 years, and it’s one of my most treasured possessions.

I was co-leading a Precept Upon Precept class. I don’t remember what book we were studying. I know it wasn’t Isaiah. But I remember a time of great doubt. A time of discouragement. Even while we dove deep into the Word, I just knew I was a fake. That I wore a mask. That I played a game that I would surely lose.

I didn’t walk or talk the way I should.

He wasn’t answering my prayers.

I couldn’t possibly belong to Him.

It wasn’t something I shared with anyone. It was my secret.

But that day. That last day of class. I opened this. A gift from those I’d spent nine months with, wrestling with the Word.

A gift straight from Him.

I have redeemed you.

I already did it. It’s done. Complete. Finished.

I have redeemed you.

I paid the price. Now you belong to me.

I have redeemed you.

Yes, YOU.

Stretched out the muchness of my love, spike stamped through eternity.

I have called you by your name. Not someone else’s.

I called you out of nothing, out of dust. I formed you, created you, a masterpiece, in my image.

Imago Dei.

And I continue to fashion you according to my blueprint.

I know your name. I know you. I know you in, and I know you out.

I know every crack and every flaw.

But I’m not done yet.

I made you.

I am making muchness of you.

I redeemed you.

I adopted you.

You belong to me.

Now and forever.

And I cling to the muchness of this.

 

Also linking with Peter Pollock’s One Word at a Time Blog Carnival on “much.”

Comments

  1. Nancy Franson says

    I just love the word muchness. And, I’m guessing most of us wrestle with sense that we’re just faking it. Which is why words like these from Scripture matter so much.

  3. Dea says

    Looks can be deceiving. I have been the queen of the fakers but not any more. When you are redeemed there is nothing to fear—no fear now and forever.

  4. Linda says

    This is encourages me so very much Sandy. I wonder if we all walk paths that are startlingly similar in nature. The scenery may be a bit different, but the experiences are so similar. I’ve been there.

  5. Shanda Oakley says

    Sandra, I needed this today. It seems that often God gives me post after post that pretty much tell me the same thing. This is one day, when I have been feeling useless, that God keeps telling me He made me, loved me and I am special and useful.

  7. Emily says

    Love this. Redemption never gets old and the Love that drives it never runs out. Hard to fathom. Thanks for reminding me!

  8. Hazel I Moon says

    He not only knows our name, but he has chosen a name for each of us. God calls me “Hazel,” so I must acknowledge that it is a good name and not one that I hated most of my life.

    Your parents loved you dearly even when you were naughty, and so does God. Isn’t that great?

  12. Alicia says

    So glad to know I’m not the only one that believed I was adopted.. or at least switched at birth! Thanks for reminding me that HE CHOSE me FIRST. Always a treat to visit here!

  13. Joanne Norton says

    Much of what you were sharing is exactly what so many people walk through at various times of life. Your approach will have touched a number of hearts… “much” of them.

    [BTW, my mother was adopted, but didn’t know it until she heard it from a neighbor in 1934 when she was 14. Caused some very serious “heart” issues, and, in some ways, she never recovered.]

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