I held you captive in my sight
while evil fingers burrowed deep, and
I heard you crying in the night.
While you focused on the light
and pumpkin-apple deer stood watch
I held you captive in my sight.
You pulled strings, made magic sleight
with finger-writing in the air, but
I heard you crying in the night.
I gathered words and tried to write
of memories and times gone by
to hold you captive in my sight.
Your body spent, His timing right
and just before the snow fell soft,
I heard you silent in the night.
You transcribed life and fought the fight
then shook and snapped the earthly chains
that held you captive in my sight.
I hear you laughing in the night.
An attempt at a villanelle, my first, in response to a prompt issued by The High Calling and T.S. Poetry Press.
Beautiful, heart rending–and uplifting. Love to you, Sandy.
Beautifully said, Sandy!
Oh, Oh, Oh.
Oh.
That’s all I have, Sandy. Oh.
precious words … precious ending … “I hear you laughing in the night” … oh, my!
You bring this together so intricately, Sandy. It is beautiful. Tears to laughing—awesome. And this, too:
“Your body spent, His timing right”
Much love to you.
Absolutely lovely. One small bit is that when my Mom died last Jan. 30th, and had never been very openly Christian in her words and deeds, but was in her heart, and was getting closer to death, she would wink at my sisters or nieces who were with her [I wasn’t able to be out West at the time] and she would say, “Going to heaven.” And I’m filled with joy when I think of that time to come. You and yours were amazing, caring family.
Oh…my…gosh! What a beautiful attempt! So poignant, so beautiful.
Sandy, Only YOU could write a villanelle that I love – and do it the first time out of the box. This is wonderful, evocative, poignant. Thank you so much.
Love you, Sandy.
yes. She is smiling at you dear. If I feel proud of you for writing a villanelle… I can only imagine how she must feel. This is beautiful Sandy.
blessings to you, to your memories, and to your heart
Beautiful, beautiful, and again, most beautiful.
I love how you altered the last line as it went.
I ache with you but hope faintly looking toward heaven and the promises we have. Beautiful words woven well.
I love it, Sandy. Beautifully done. Especially the last verse: I heard you laughing in the night. That is how I think of my loved ones who are now gone, passed into Paradise. It brings a great deal of comfort. Still lifting you and your family in prayer.
I don’t know what a “villanelle” is but I loved your poem! I write poetry as well, so I will look it up. This is lovely about a grief filled event, I write a lot of that.
Thanks!