The letters, they come every Christmas, faithful as the sunrise, shedding light on their lives. We’ve known each other for over 40 years when we worked together, and she encouraged the cute “detail man” to ask me out. I say “told.” He says “suggested.” She says “encouraged.” We visited them in Fort Rucker and then in […]
Ready or Not
I’ve had months to get ready. But I’m not ready. I google “animals in Haiti,” “birds in Haiti,” “snakes in Haiti.” and “Haitian culture.” I immerse myself inFlickr‘ed blue and red and green and pink gingerbread architecture and cough from dust rising in YouTubevideos. I wonder if I’ll have to eat goat.
Still Grappling with Grief
One year ago yesterday, my mother died. I’m angry. And sad. And grateful. I’m remembering, second-guessing every decision. Immediately after her fall and diagnosis of a brain tumor, she spent several weeks in a local nursing home. She was not safe for surgery at that point. After the biopsy, she transferred to rehab where […]
You’ve Got to be Dreaming! Plus Making Music (or Not) and a Retreat
I had a dream. It came in a big walnut box banded with black and white. It was the first piece of furniture we bought together after our wedding, and when I closed my eyes, I could see my fingers fly up and down those keys. I took lessons weekly after work, and she made […]
The Tick Tock of My Heart
Egg salad sandwiches. I’m pretty sure that’s what she served. And sweet gherkins in a glass pickle dish. We probably drank iced tea while seated knee-to-knee at the formica table right here, our backs to the window. And pie. I suspect we had pie. Or heaping bowls of ice cream. It was the first […]
Roots, Relationships, and a Seagull
The parsley and the basil roots pant for water as they bake in their biodegradable pots. I meant to sink them deep long before this. And the geranium 6-pack baskets, bought over a month ago when spring exploded early? Once luscious red, now with browned heads. I need perennials. Plants that thrive and spread […]
Spiritual Seizures, Surrender, Starvation, and Possibility
It’s an Indian taco spread, and I’ve heaped my plate. I’m munching homemade tortilla chips while I watch the birthday girl in the air-filled jump house. And one of my daughter’s friends, he says those words. “You’re a good writer, right?” I stare a minute, and mutter quiet. “Um, I write.” Mentally I smack myself […]
Senses of Joy (Retitled Repost)
Sometimes joy hides right in the open, waits for me to notice. thrums with sweet surprises to melt life bitter while I look squinty eyed right at her or past her or through her. But with my God-tinted lenses, I see her in the midst of the storm. And a grandgirl hidden in Yahweh. I […]
In Which I Leave the Bedside
I’m twenty years old, working as a G.N. (graduate nurse), still waiting to find out if I passed my boards. It’s 3 p.m., and I come on duty to discover I’m in charge of all the intensive care patients. I have two regularly-scheduled nurse’s aides and one practical nurse who’s never worked on this […]
I’m Drunk
God’s been romancing me this week. Wooing me in pinks and golds and greens and blues. I drink His beauty, but I can’t get enough. I take photo after photo from the kitchen window of the blooming tree next to the garage, about 40 feet away (and discover that the big girl camera has captured […]
