The wicker basket spewed the toys all over the living room this morning.
Again.
The grandgirl spewed bananas and cereal all over my fresh-washed white robe.
Again.
I’ve closed doors and moved furniture strategically to block baby finger magnets.
Again.
I notice a vague ache in my back.
Either Lillee is getting heavier or I’m getting weaker.
Or both.
More the latter.
I forget that I did all this nearly 30 years ago.
And I let go of the writing then.
How do the younger writer moms do it?
I’m guessing it’s possible that my batteries drain a little sooner now.
Today I’m frustrated.
And a little discouraged.
So many things scream for my attention.
I’m smothered by time, procrastination, and fatigue.
Big black ants spew from somewhere in our bedroom and die all over the house.
The microwave handle fell off in my hand and languishes on the Hoosier cabinet.
Tattered and half-stripped wallpaper mocks me.
I’m going to finish painting my husband’s office this week.
Really.
For sure.
Maybe.
I need to pull the income tax stuff together.
I need to pay bills.
I need to buy groceries.
I hate the dust that the setting sun reveals.
I wanted to buy a dress two sizes smaller for the company event.
The dryer has a strange burn smell.
That can’t be good.
Blog traffic is down, and someone just unsubscribed.
And I wonder if I shouldn’t just let go of the writing again.
Yep, it’s one of those days.
But this, too, shall pass.
On the bright side, I think I finally figured out how to combine three historical events into my novel.
And the theme.
And what the main character wants.
That must be good.
Be brave Be strong. Don’t give up. Expect God to get here soon.
~Psalm 31:24 (Message)
I’m so grateful that we are forever in His grip. Even on the days (weeks, months, years) when we feel like letting go of the dreams which He has placed inside of us, He is with us working to orchestrate something grand.
Yes, this too shall pass. In the meantime, I’m lifting you up in prayer, Snady.
I’m so glad we are part of the same orchestra, Melinda!
Sounds like life. Praying it gets better.
Life is what happens when we’re making other plans, right? Thanks for the prayers.
Don’t give up! Persistence pays off. 🙂 Thanks Sandra–great reminder.
Thanks, Jason. You inspire me.
I LOVE YOU!!! Believing in you always and keeping you in my prayers even today.
😀 😀
Come. Quickly. Bring. Coffee.
LYI.
Yep Sandra, I can relate. Let’s just keep reading those last five lines together. Again. And again. One more time. Those five lines alone far outweigh the previous thirty-five. Yes, I counted. I read them all. 😉
That’s great news about pinning down some details for your novel. So stop wondering about letting it go. You know what you’re called to do. 🙂
Thanks for the encouragement, Brock! Counting lines, now. 😉
I love that verse from the Message, too. Does that line count?
Ah yes! How could I forget! (forehead smack!) I’d say that one verse far outweighs everything else! 🙂
😀 😀
Okay, sweetie. This is your sister talking to you. I got the picture you painted so vividly and I know what it feels like. Boy do I know. Sigh.
So here’s some medicine which has always worked for me: bring in beauty right where you are. Right now. In the middle of the messiness. Just bring it in. Don’t wait for a moment when there is time.
When you go to the grocery store, buy some inexpensive cheery flowers. At home, put them in a vase where you wash the dishes or sit often. Make a little cleared space around the vase. Tomorrow, write about the flowers, and why you like them. What do they make you think of? (Every week, repeat with fresh ones. Walmart sells them for $5 or less)
Every morning, spent a few minutes just gazing at the flowers. Le their beauty charge your creative soul.
Next, go to the library with that baby and check out some gardening, travel, or decorating books. Set them in a stack beside your favorite chair. When the baby naps or you drink a cup of tea, enjoy one picture. Soak it up.
Put on praise music you love. Let it soothe and minister. Think about the words and let the beauty of their truth fill your mind. And in your quiet times, worship the Lord in the beauty of holiness. Just read a psalm each day (maybe beside those flowers) and let it wash over you.
Begin with small things like these — just a few. Work out from these in little bits of free time to clear clutter in one tiny area at the time — creating a fresh order in your home. (But ignore the baby toys). It will make you feel like a new person before long. And that writing? — it’s going to come a lot easier now.
Best to you! I know this is very challenging!!
Sigh. I don’t think I’m going to make it to the store today. Tomorrow. I will go tomorrow. And get those flowers. And write about them Friday.
Thanks for this, Sis!
I laughed right out loud in my cubicle when I read this as I have had a similar kind of day… week… month…well, you know. The beauty of your writing, my dear Sissy, is that most everyone can relate. It is real and heartwarming. It WILL get better. In the meantime, relax, have a cup of tea — maybe flowering tea and watch it bloom — scoop up Lillee and cuddle her for as long as she’ll let you — and have Grace give you a great big hug when she gets home. Tomorrow is another day.
And if all that isn’t totally successful, remember your Sissy still has Christmas bulbs teetering in a box on a chair, a Nativity set still drawing my eye at night, bags of special chocolates spilled onto the big table waiting for me to finish the Christmas goodies (but Easter isn’t that far off now), simlar toys strewn through my house, and a HUGE bin bin of papers on the kitchen table still awaiting sorting… And, oh yeah… I haven’t done my taxes yet either.
Know in all things, you are not alone!
Love you!
Ha! I wondered if you’d weigh in today. So Friday–flowers and flowering tea. It’s a wrap.
And maybe dinner at Gizzard City. Yes, he got the coupon, but I didn’t see him open it. He didn’t get home until almost 2 a.m. Too funny!
Abby’s boxes of Christmas decorations are teetering in the laundry room waiting for me to find a place to store them for her. Gracee’s Christmas ornament is on the grain bin, and I just found a felt stocking under some cookbooks on the antique high chair.
We must be sisters.
Dennis ate all the candy.
Love you more!
You know I couldn’t leave that one alone and would take the bait! I’ll send you a pic — maybe — if you promise not to post….
But why wait ’til Friday for flowers? Go now! Must I do everything??? 🙂
Would you please? Thank you. My birthday flowers are on their last leg–er stem.
These are the days…. the very best days…. to write. And you did. And I am proud that you did. Another thought: The book of Hebrews is filled with the early church’s example of the spiritual planting of seeds. Some of them never saw the fruit of their reward. You may never see the “fruit” of your deadhead writing days……….only the pure exhaustion of “thinking” you weren’t making a difference. When in fact, you were. Somewhere down the road.
Love these thoughts, Sue. Thanks for weighing in.
There must be a song in deadhead days. Or a poem.
Sissy,
Sue is right. Ever heard of Thomas Merton? He was a Trappist monk who wrote:
“Do not depend on the hope of results. When you are doing the sort of work you have taken on, essentially an apostolic work, you may have to face the fact that your work will be apparently worthless and even achieve no result at all, if not perhaps results opposite to what you expect. As you get used to this idea, you start more and more to concentrate not on the results but on the value, the rightness, the truth of the work itself… In the end, it is the reality of personal relationships that saves everything…
…The big results are not in your hands or mine, but they suddenly happen…
…All the good that you will do will come not from you but from the fact that you have allowed yourself, in the obedience of faith, to be used by God’s love…
…The real hope, then is not in something we think we can do but in God who is making something good out of it in some way we cannot see…”
(excerpt: Letter to a Social Activist)
Awesome thoughts. I know them. I needed to hear them. I need to take another jaunt over to Amazon.
Trying to remember to say the right thing in the right place but finding it is far more difficult to leave unsaid the wrong thing at this tempting moment. Love ya! (LOL)
That reminds me. I also need to write my mother.
“On the bright side, I think I finally figured out how to combine three historical events into my novel. And the theme. And what the main character wants.”
See there! The writer in you is still at work. Maybe just percolating in the background a bit while other things take precedence. I think we can all take encouragement from this. Don’t give up!
Even a bad, I mean challenging, day can dump grist into the writing mill.
Pressing on. Not giving up. 🙂
i remember having the couch in front of the stereo and all the dining room chairs on their side, the kitchen cabinets baby friendly, a lock on the toilet lid, very careful with the door to the basement stairs, kid toys in the bottom kitchen drawer… never never new furniture ..still don’t have that.
aching back, less sleep, car seats, books, diapers, wipes… oh the list goes on and on!
Yes! I need to turn all the chairs on their sides so she doesn’t pull one over on her while she’s trying to pull up!
I thought when I became a grandma, I could have some new stuff. Not a real good idea. 😉
I loved your blog today. It is life turned up side down which is succes. It slows us down to see the beauty in the moment. Blessings
Hi Beth!
Welcome, and thank you.
I’ve popped over to your blog and look forward to looking around and getting to know you. 🙂
I bought myself some flowers last week … first time ever … it works! They make me smile even as they are winding down … and smiles are priceless.
I got some this morning. Hyacinths. They made me smile. I’ll write about them tomorrow.
You would think as we get older we would have more time to write. Not for me. My mother’s 87 and her health problems demand my attention. I try to help my DIL out with my three grandkids since my son works three weeks and is home three weeks. And then the church activities, my own health problems, my husband’s health problems–the list goes on and on. There will never be a perfect time. We just have to squeeze our writing in when we can!
You are exactly right, Sheila. We gotta squeeze the writing time out of life’s lemons. No giving up allowed.
And if everything was rosy, we’d have nothing to write about. Right?
You are exactly right, Sheila. We gotta squeeze the writing time out of life’s lemons. No giving up allowed.
And if everything was rosy, we’d have nothing to write about. Well, that anyone would want to read.
All the good stuff has already been said, Sandra! (I’m always late to the party). I’m just here to give hugs. Can you feel this BIG ONE across the miles? I tell you, I’ve been here a lot lately. So, here’s another hug. And another. CAn’t wait to read that novel!
Love the hugs. I feel them! Sending a bushel of them back to you!
Oh, Sandy –
I can relate to your predicament. My days go by so fast and with so much undone.
Each morning, I’m praying, “Lord, help me to accomplish what’s important to You.” Today, Mom needed me for grocery shopping and an appointment. Those were the priorities, and I rejoiced spending that time with her.
Someday, people will go through all my “stuff,” divide it, throw it out, give it away. But…they’ll remember the love and good times we shared.
Blessings,
Susan 🙂
Accomplishing what’s important to Him on any given day. And being open enough to know what it is. That’s my heart.
I’m hoping to throw out most of the “stuff” before I’m gone. 🙂
Yup. I SO relate.
You’ll notice I’m just now reading your posts from a week ago. Need you ask why?
This too, shall pass, cracked-pot. 😀