I am in a land of shiny things.
AKA–the Verizon Store.
Where inhabitants speak a strange language and rows upon rows of shiny alien mouths line up neatly on shelves. I’ve owned these before. Their little jaws have bitten me in the past. Snapped right on the web between my right thumb and forefinger and wouldn’t let go.
Just dangled there.
I’ve come back for a mini lesson on the care and feeding of my new pocket pet. Like how to respond when it demands attention. I don’t even know how to answer it or talk to it.
And it needs a longer leash. AKA a charger cord thingie so it doesn’t hurt itself by jumping off my nightstand.
Which still isn’t really long enough.
And I need to talk about things like running apps and saving batteries and social networking and earbuds and visor doohickies–while others around me snicker.
We come to this place every two years.
And every two years I leave with a headache.
So. Many. Choices.
And a desire for the shiniest.
Even though the reality is that though they dazzle my eyes, I don’t navigate well in their shining.
This year is easier.
Because it’s just us. Hubby. Me. And our biting pets. No other family members in tow.
Bigger and better taunt me. Things called iPads and smart phones and netbooks and mounts and skins and blue teeth.
Do blue teeth bite harder?
These pets have names like Fascinate and Zeal and Galaxy and Blackberry (Curve or Bold) and Accolade (hmmm), and Alias and Convoy and . . .
They all sparkle and dance and cry, “Me! Choose ME!”
Last time I wanted to take home a Blackberry. A Storm, maybe? But we couldn’t justify the cost, and so I settled for a biter.
And I was not happy.
I was a biter myself for about a week. Moped and growled and snapped at everyone.
I even kept my pet red Chocolate (why was there no BROWN chocolate?) close for several months, not ready to put it down.
And for two years, tethered to the far reaches of the Internet, my right thumb joint spasmed as it paged down.
But now–now we’ve got COUPONS!
As in FREE. My husband’s love language.
I’ve decided on an alien named Droid. And I’m not giving in to snapping jaws.
Although my husband did. He favors the forgotten.
Anyway, out we come with two bags of phones and accessories and a bill high enough to rival the national debt on the family plan. And terror-stricken at the thought of losing rebate receipts.
Losing rebate receipts is NOT my husband’s love language.
Droid made strange sounds all night. Makes them today. Snuggled right here next to me.
Drooooid! (It speaks to me!)
And a harp-like ring.
G-mail, home mail, Facebook, Twitter, text messages, calls, missed calls, voice mail.
And do I touch, multi touch, touch and hold, drag, tap, or double tap?
Flick, flutter, or fold?
But what if these sounds become so familiar, I learn to ignore them?
What if I lose my wonder in the familiar?
It could happen.
It does happen. All the time. Every day.
Living in the Land of the Familiar where God shines in the smallest things.
While my wonder wanders.
And so I’m unplugging for a bit and heading out to the yard.
To find His glow and let Him shine me up.
And I’m sure Droid and I will bond soon, and I will go through this again in another two years.
Plugging in with L.L. Barkat’s On, In and Around Mondays again today. She’ll be there soon. Unless she’s lost in the Verizon store.
I’m DYING laughing and so wishing I was there to laugh at I mean help you. You’ll get it and you’ll wonder what you ever did without it! I’ll pray for you, but I’m convinced Jesus has an Iphone. XOXOXOXO!
LOL! For someone looking for simplicity, this is beyond. Although I found a calendar on it and some other good stuff. My whole life in a Droid. 😉
You’ll be amazed at how much of your life will fit in there. Just keep it backed up on your computer in case you lose it/it breaks. You’ll feel like you lost your arm. Trust me.
Huh? Back phone up on computer? Hyperventilating here.
P.S. I probably should learn how to back up my computer. I used to have a little backup thingie. I forgot what it was called. But I don’t think it ever worked right.
I think I need to sign up for one of those online services.
I was afraid that might put you over the edge. My bad. on-line service-yes. You should be able to connect your droid to the computer and the program should back it up for you. Simple. Promise. If not, put it in a suitcase and come to Georgia. Work trip 🙂
I don’t know why your comment ended up like that (no reply option), but you’ll be glad to know I now know how to answer the silly thing. As far as the other stuff–well, a work trip could be in my future. 😉
Oh my world – HILARIOUS! Haha! And I love this:
“As in FREE. My husband’s love language.”
Many years ago we lost HUNDREDS of dollars because I threw away our receipts! YIKES!
Enjoy your new toys! I’m jealous because my husband and I SHARE a cell phone…from like the 90’s. 😉 Seriously in need of an upgrade!!!
I remember being stranded on a dark road, alone as a teen, and having to walk to a little motel (not sure anyone was there) to call my dad from a pay phone. I’d driven a flat tire down to the rim. Talk about scary stuff today. Pretty scary then.
There are days when I wish I had no phone at all.
I LOVE my DROID!!! And if you @mention @bibledude in a tweet, you can bet that I’ll hear a little ‘tweet-tweet’ almost instantly, and I’ll smile.
Thinking of you smiling.
I’m an iPhone girl after years of resistance while my family – those early adopters (or is it adapters?) – traded in their flip phones for the world of what used to be 3G. I hung on to my little red phone without a name, content just to call and text – pressing the letter A three times to get to C. But when I finally caved, 3G had turned to 4G and it was love at first bite – I mean sight! And yes…I am addicted. And I feel guilty when I leave it alone while I am out there in the yard.
BTW: I’ve watched @bibledude work his Droid. He is a for real Droid pro!
I think I am still in the 3G world with my Droid. The 2 was the free one. 😉
I may need Dan to help me. I’ve learned how to call out and talk today, but I’ve hung up on everyone that’s called me.
Michelle DeRusha says
I am truly entertained by this Sandra, and a little bit in awe. Because I have an antiquated flip phone and that’s more than enough…and more than I can handle. Yes, I still press the A three times to get to C, as Dee mentioned. And I still haven’t figured out to text puncutation. So clearly I am not Droid material.
My kids are laughing, too. I was pretty fast the the flip phone, even one-handed–flipping and pressing that A three times without even looking. This one takes the two-handed approach.
I failed to mention that my phone was also held together with tape.
Bud Ezekiel says
enjoy your new droid!!! after dropping my very reliable cellphone into the toilet(don’t ask-won’t tell policy) i had to replace it. my wife and i decided we’d both get a new one and settled for Evo. i call it evil. what a pain. it has to be charged daily. it has all the bells and whistles most of which i don’t need or desire. you have to swipe the stupid thing to unlock it before you can use it. then if you have hand tremors like i do, i find myself getting everything/everyone else other then my desire. i’d love to drop this one deliberately into the toilet. my wife constantly forgets her work pager and i end up driving to her workplace hospital to deliver it. but she NEVER forgets her evil!
I’m sensing more of these get flushed than people admit–either accidentally or on purpose. Too funny.
Heidi Main says
Oh my – you are hysterical! I have a bit of a headache simply hearing about this experience. Enjoy your baby droid. I’ve been thinking of adopting one myself . . .
Heehee. Oh, Heidi, hurry so we could bring our pets together for play dates.
L.L. Barkat says
You are so funny. 🙂
Not lost in the store. Lost in my peaceful path (and not wanting to come back to civilization).
😀 I’m all over your peaceful path. Quietly, of course.
Laughing out loud in the land of frozen breath and snow.
Do blue teeth bite harder?
Too too funny!
in the hush of the moon says
too funny! i love that “free” is your hubby’s love language. it’s my hubby’s too. 🙂
I knew we were connected in more ways than one!
Melinda Lancaster says
I’m pretty sure that blue teeth leave blue marks.
If you want to know more about your new pet Droid…Google it!
I haven’t visited a phone store in many, many years. This posts reminds me of the reasons why.
You’ll tame that Droid, Snady. It’s just a matter of time. Or Brenda will show you:-) XOXOXO
Oh yes. Mr. Google and I are very close friends. And the manual is very long . . .
Melinda Lancaster says
I never read manuals. Although one of the reasons they are so long is the fact that they are now in at least 3 different languages.
The forums provide much better information with about a quarter of the steps.
Let me know when you master texting. Maybe we can exchange numbers!
Texting is not a problem. I’m pretty much an expert. 🙂
Tami Heim says
This is priceless – like living my adoption all over again. Thanks for the smile you always bring to my face and heart. If you ever need a baby sitter – I am there for you! XXOO
Yay! So Droid needs to sleep on a very soft bed to muffle his night sounds.