Sandra Heska King

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Black Friday Fellowship

November 30, 2010 By Sandra Heska King

I am a member of the Black Friday Fellowship.

Or maybe it’s the Sisterhood of Silliness.

Whatever it is, it’s tradition. This dark rising to set forth into the land of cold and crowds. Slushing through snow in tennis shoes and unbuttoned jackets. Gloveless.

It always begins with a coffee stop. Sometimes there’s a plan, a mapped-out route based on store openings to purchase a specific sale item.

Like my Dad’s TV. Bought before we realized we forgot to empty the trunk of packed bins, so the TV had to ride on my lap to my folks’ house. Where my sister spent several minutes trying to raise my sleeping father. She could see him in his favorite spot on the living room floor.

“Dad! Let me in. DAD! LET! ME! IN!

Abby and I convulsed in laughter there in the back of the car at 5:30 a.m. while Dad snored on. Lights came on in the neighborhood, and we expected sirens at any moment.

One year we stuffed the car with brand new bed pillows and had to return home to unload before we could go back out. That must have been the year we heard about dust mites.

Really, though, it’s about fellowship. And about older women acting silly–to the embarrassment of their daughters.

Like the time Sissy pretended to get her hand stuck in one of those automatic trash cans.

Or when she and I raced through the store to be the first–pant, pant–at the blue light special.

“Hurry! Run! This way! Which way? THIS way! C’mon, people. Let’s go.”

And the time we were interviewed on the radio. Well, the niece was–and she accidentally dissed her favorite Lions team.

There was the year I tooled around in one of those automatic carts after I had broken my foot. And the year we wound around outside in the cold at ABC Warehouse.

We sold some silly jingle hats for K-Mart this year when we put them on and danced through the store–and then again at checkout.

“Where did you get that?” asked one customer. And went back for her own.

We might fall in line behind the girls and mimic their walk or hide in a clothes rack.

There was the year we started across an icy parking lot while my daughter had gone ahead to start the van.

“Fall!” ordered my sister.

Ever the obedient older one, I dropped to the pavement ice behind the van, and Sissy pounded on the van window.

“Lady, stop! Lady, STOP!”

Yes, there were confused onlookers.

We always plan a trip to Isabella’s, the kitchen store. There we drool over items and sometimes buy a little thing or two or just drop gift hints. And we really enjoy the free sampler breakfast spread. This year they served stuffed blueberry French toast and egg strata and a veggie tray (that included fresh asparagus) and a goat cheese dip with crackers and fresh fruit (grapes and blackberries) and scones.

We parked behind an SUV-type vehicle in front of Isabella’s. Two gals carried boxes from the store to add to the pile already packed in. (We later found out they were transporting items from one store to another.)

“Is that Brandy?” asked my daughter.

“Why, I think so,” said Sissy. “How much will you give me to steal sneak take pretend to lift one of those boxes?”

“A couple dollars. That’s all I have.”

Good enough.

Brandy returned to the store, and my sister hopped out of the car, helped herself to a box (filled with gift packs) and started back about the time the other gal (not Brandy) came out of the store with yet another box.

“What are you doing?”

My usually silver-tongued sister (who I’m not sure had a plan at that point anyway) simply stammered, “Ummm . . . ummm . . . where’s Brandy?”

Good times.

But the pearl of our Black Friday follies happened at Diana’s, a breakfast stop a couple years ago. The waitress passed by with some kind of stuffed French toast. Our eight eyes followed, and my sister said to my daughter, “I’ll give you five dollars if you ask that lady if you can taste her food.”

“Oh right,” laughed Abby.

“No, really. I’m serious.”

My niece squirmed and slid down in the booth with her Blackberry. She did not look up.

Abby hesitated. She could use the money.

“I’ll double it,” I said. “Ten dollars. Dare you.”

My niece’s chin was on the table now.

Up from the booth Abby rose. Tiptoed to the lady.

“Um, could I have a taste of that?”

Everyone in the full restaurant stared.

Silence.

Wide-eyed, the lady looked around for the hidden camera. My niece was under the table now. Sissy and I are turned purple as we tried to cork our laughter.

“Sure.”

We exploded.

“No, no. Really. It’s a bet. A joke. Just kidding. I’m sorry.”

The whole restaurant exploded.

And afterwards, the waitress offered us all the leftovers from that table.

Sometimes we live life too seriously.

Yes, I confess. I am a member of the Black Friday Fellowship. The Sisterhood of Silliness. Tradition. Costly gifts without price tags. Memories.

 

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Comments

  1. ANONYMOUS says

    November 30, 2010 at 6:56 pm

    I am appalled! Is there anything else I don’t know about???

    • Sandra says

      November 30, 2010 at 10:12 pm

      Hi, Mom. 😀 I don’t think so. I think we’ve told you just about everything. Pretty much. Maybe. Or not.

      It might not be a bad idea if you set aside some bail money.

  2. Sissy says

    November 30, 2010 at 8:18 pm

    Bravo! Smiled all the way through. Our daughters will appreciate our humor one day (at least that’s what I tell myself!)

    My Sissy — the writer!

    • Sandra says

      November 30, 2010 at 10:12 pm

      They’ll miss us when we’re gone. And one day, they’ll be up to our tricks.

      I love my sissy.

  3. Lynn Mosher says

    November 30, 2010 at 9:23 pm

    LOL! Oh, this is too funny! I’d love to follow you around…oh, wait! No thanks! That’s too early! I’d rather sleep!

    • Sandra says

      November 30, 2010 at 10:13 pm

      We can have just as much fun at noon. So pack your bags next year. We might even put you in a cart and do wheelies with you. 🙂

  4. Janis@Open My Ears Lord says

    November 30, 2010 at 9:39 pm

    Too fun!! You are so blessed to have sisters and daughters and a niece. And they all live close by where you can do silly things like that! It is so wonderful to share woman fellowship and be goofy. I treasure the opportunity I had to do that with friends back in April. Wonderful times.
    Thanks for your delightful post! I needed a smile tonight.

    Blessings,
    Janis

    • Sandra says

      November 30, 2010 at 10:15 pm

      Very blessed. And one of the reasons we moved back to Michigan. We are still three hours apart, so we don’t get to be goofy as often as we like. I suppose that’s what makes BF so special.

  5. Susan J. Reinhardt says

    November 30, 2010 at 9:48 pm

    Oh my, Sandy, we’ve never seen this side of you! LOL!

    Blessings,
    Susan

    • Sandra says

      November 30, 2010 at 10:15 pm

      😀 How does it look from that side, Susan?

  6. Terri Tffany says

    December 1, 2010 at 8:38 am

    Oh I laughed all the way through this!! What fun!! Call me the next time you go out:)

    • Sandra says

      December 1, 2010 at 5:14 pm

      You got it, Terri!

  7. Tami Heim says

    December 1, 2010 at 9:04 am

    I love you Sandy. Maybe next year I will jump right in with you. Maybe. XXOO

    • Sissy says

      December 1, 2010 at 11:07 am

      See you at 4:00 a.m., November 24, 2011. Sandy will send you the address. 🙂

      • Sandra says

        December 1, 2010 at 5:15 pm

        So there you go. See you then–but probably before. 🙂

  8. Jennifer@GDWJ says

    December 1, 2010 at 9:48 am

    I have never been a part of the Black Friday Fellowship. But yes, we can ABSOLUTELY

  9. Jennifer@GDWJ says

    December 1, 2010 at 9:49 am

    … Ok … I’ll finish now… 🙂 … (Sorry about that!)

    Yes, we can ABSOLUTELY be friends. You make me laugh, Sandy. What joy you bring to this corner of the World Wide Web!

    • Sandra says

      December 1, 2010 at 5:17 pm

      Oh, I’m so glad. I like being your friend. 🙂

  10. Sharon says

    December 1, 2010 at 10:27 am

    Absolutely loved this! Without sisters/daughters etc to share in the “fun” I’ve never taken part of Black Friday Fellowship. Then last year my husband, yes I said “my husband” suggested we get up at 4am to shop. He had the whole day planned – and we spent ALL DAY shopping. This year we started at 9pm Thanksgiving night shopped until 2am, came home to sleep a few hours and got up and did another 5 hrs!!

    I may not have “girls” in my life to do the silly things with but creating fun memories with my husband is good too… although I must admit shopping with “the girls” would be a totally different kind of fun.

    Love you girl!!

    • Sandra says

      December 1, 2010 at 5:18 pm

      What fun! What a guy! Love you back, girlfriend.

  11. Sam Van Eman says

    December 1, 2010 at 10:52 am

    What a memorable way to spend Black Friday! I have so many issues with consumerism that it’s often difficult for me to remember fellowship experiences like this one.

    Thanks, Sandra.

    • Sandra says

      December 1, 2010 at 5:22 pm

      Honestly, I know it’s out there, but I’ve never seen craziness, and there are so few days when we are all together. As long as we get coffee and food and have a little fun, we’re good. 🙂

  12. Duane Scott says

    December 1, 2010 at 12:00 pm

    Most entertaining read all week!

    Seriously.

    If you weren’t such a awesome writer, I’d put you on my “weird friends” list, but whatev…

    I still like to read these things.

    • Sandra says

      December 1, 2010 at 5:22 pm

      As I recall, you already have me on some strange lists. 😉

  13. Hazel Moon says

    December 2, 2010 at 6:02 pm

    I am not a morning person, but my daughter did get me to shop with her starting at 9:00 am (definitely not 4:00 am) I had taken the day off from work as a vacation day, and off we went to shop. I did not notice the newspaper reporter taking our photo, but as we searched the night wear for the perfect Pajamas – – we were snapped. The next Monday when I reported for work, one of my co-workers informed me that my picture was in the paper and it was a good thing I had NOT called in sick. Anyway, I was glad too, for my mother always said, be sure your sin will find you out, and I have learned to be truthful and honest. (smile.) WOW, I am going to save this for one of my posts!

    • Sandra says

      December 3, 2010 at 9:52 pm

      Good one, Hazel! We never know who’s watching. 😉

  14. Anne Lang Bundy says

    December 3, 2010 at 12:22 am

    You are nuts. I’ll get up at 5am for a sunrise. Or for fellowship with the Lord. Or even for fellowship with a friend. But NOT to fight Black Friday crowds in Michigan cold.

    If you and I ever move to a warmer locale, I’ll consider going with you though. 😀

    • Sandra says

      December 3, 2010 at 10:23 am

      Ha Ha! We can be as silly at noon. And we are usually laughing so hard, we seldom feel cold. And you know, as much as I dislike confusion, I’ve never felt like we were fighting crowds. We seem to find camaraderie everywhere. 🙂

      I’m not sure I can be silly with everyone, though. I think it’s Sissy’s fault. 😉

  15. Carol J. Garvin says

    December 3, 2010 at 5:50 pm

    I can’t remember ever being quite that silly, even when I was younger. But I have two married daughters who would be able to relate to this post. They don’t get to do the Black Friday thing together, but whenever they do get together there is always hilarity spilling over in abundance. The time they declined help in the kitchen while making the traditional Grasshopper Pie for Christmas dinner and then when pieces were served up and people asked what the unexpected red bits were… “grasshopper guts!” they shrieked in laughter. Oh, the stories I could tell about them.

    • Sandra says

      December 3, 2010 at 9:58 pm

      Hysterical. What fun! Great memories.

      Sometimes when I try to explain something “funny” we’ve done, I get blank stares. Sometimes you just have to be there. 🙂

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